♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles ♪
♪ Heroes in a half-shell Turtle power! ♪
♪ They're the world's Most fearsome fighting team ♪
LEONARDO: We're really hip.
♪ They're heroes In the half-shell ♪
♪ And they're green ♪
RAPHAEL: Hey, get a grip.
♪ When the evil Shredder Attacks ♪
♪ These Turtle boys Don't cut him no slack ♪
♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles ♪
♪ Splinter taught them to be Ninja teens ♪
LEONARDO: He's a radical rat.
♪ Leonardo leads Donatello does machines ♪
DONATELLO: That's a fact, Jack.
♪ Raphael is cool but crude ♪ RAPHAEL: Give me a break.
♪ Michelangelo is a party Dude ♪ MICHELANGELO: Party!
♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles ♪
♪ Heroes in a half-shell ♪
♪ Turtle power! ♪
[♪♪♪]
DONATELLO: I don't believe it.
we just won a free European cruise
from Greasy Eddie's Pizza.
ALL: All right, dudes. Yeah!
I just knew scarfing all that pizza
would pay off someday.
What is all the excitement, my turtles?
We just won a free ocean voyage to Europe for five.
For five?
That means you too, Master.
Hm.
I'm not sure of the advisability
of such a journey.
You're all so inexperienced in the ways of the world.
All the more reason to go.
It'll broaden us.
Bingo. Even more than Greasy Eddie's pizzas.
It is true,
you have grown, my turtles.
And it is time you learned about the wide world
beyond the sewers.
We set sail for Europe immediately.
All right!
I'm ready for some heavy-duty shuffleboarding.
Shuffleboarding?
Is that anything like surfboarding?
Radical notion, dude,
I never rode a shuffleboard before.
I believe their education
cannot start soon enough.
I still can't believe it.
We won first prize on this luxury liner.
Fellas, this isn't our ship.
That is.
I wonder if it's too late to ask for second prize.
[CHUCKLES]
Some sailors.
We haven't even left the dock
and already they're green.
Gentlemen.
A giant rat?
If that guy jumps ship,
we'll know it's sinking.
"Enjoy spacious state rooms
"with all the latest amenities."
What's "amenities" mean?
It's a fancy name for cockroaches.
[TURTLES GROANING]
There you are, my turtles.
Is something wrong?
[GROANS]
Maybe pizza for breakfast
wasn't such a dynamite idea.
[GROANS]
Don't bring up pizza, dude.
I hope you've regained your appetites
by the time we reach Paris.
What succulent dishes await you.
Pheasant under glass,
chocolate truffles,
asparagus in a thick hollandaise sauce.
Snails.
[ALL GROANING]
KRANG: Shredder, if I waited for you
to transport the Technodrome to Earth,
my brain matter would turn gray.
Obviously you're a complete incompetent.
But fortunately I'm all brains.
The neutronic generator I sent you
will provide enough power
to fuel an electromagnetic antenna.
With it, I can pull the Technodrome
through the dimensional portal to Earth.
A waste of time, Krang.
Just where will I find a mass of metal
large enough to move the Technodrome?
Must I think of everything?
There's only one structure on Earth
that will fill our needs:
The Eiffel Tower.
[♪♪♪]
SPLINTER: The sewers of Paris
are the most famous in the world.
They were built hundreds of years ago.
Excuse me, Master,
but so far this isn't exactly what we had in mind
for our vacation.
I mean, it's okay down here, sensei,
but if you've seen one sewer, you've seen them all.
You have not yet learned
to appreciate a different culture.
Culture is for yogurt lovers.
We'd rather party hardy.
You shall, my turtles.
But always remember that you are ninjas first
and tourists second.
Practice will keep your ninja skills
from growing rusty.
Let's show him we don't need any practice.
Come on, fellas.
Turtle power!
Ah!
Whoa!
[LOUD CRASH]
[GRUNTS]
Already you fight like teenage mutant ninja tourists.
Sorry, Master,
it appears we could use a little practice.
Not to mention a ladder.
[♪♪♪]
So those fools have brought the Channel Six newsman.
I'll give them a story to cover:
Their own obituaries.
This neutronic generator
ought to make them stand up and say, "Yowch."
Isn't this exciting, April?
Here we are in Paris,
the city of love and romance.
April, are you there?
I sure am, chief.
All set to cover the Bastille Day ceremonies.
There's been a change in the game plan.
Vernon will anchor the live coverage instead of you.
Vernon?
That egomaniac couldn't anchor a rowboat.
Now, now, jealous, jealous.
Just what am I supposed to do,
make crêpe suzettes?
No. Taste them.
[LAUGHS]
You'll be doing a feature on French restaurants.
[LAUGHING]
Great, I went from feeding information
to feeding my face.
Hey, look at the bright side.
You may have lost the assignment,
but you'll probably gain lots of weight.
Thanks a lump, Irma.
See you later.
[ALL PLAYING]
Okay, Vernon, you're on.
Uh, bonjour.
We're coming to you...
[GULPS]
...live, from Paris,
uh, that's in France, you know,
where the Bastille Day ceremonies are about to start--
Uh, commence.
Uh, begin.
[LAUGHS]
Uh, it's terrible when you know a lot of words.
Bebop, Rocksteady,
you're about the witness
the most powerful tourist attraction in Paris.
[MAGNETIC HUMMING]
[BUTTONS POPPING]
[ALL SCREAMING]
Stop that, people.
You can't run through here.
We're on the air.
Not anymore, we're not.
[PANTING]
Vernon, where are you going?
It's every anchorman for himself.
[GRUNTS]
Vernon, what's going on?
I haven't the slightest idea.
[SHOUTING]
Vernon,
come back with that microphone!
It's Channel Six property.
[IRMA AND VERNON SCREAMING]
IRMA: Vernon, do something.
Do what?
You've got the microphone,
call someone.
You're right.
Mama!
[VERNON HOWLING]
Help!
IRMA: Stay calm, Vernon.
Take deep breathes.
I'll try.
[SIGHS]
There. Isn't that better?
You're right, Irma,
I feel a whole lot calmer.
Good. Then in that case,
Help!
All right, sensei,
I'm ready for anything you can throw at me.
Hey!
Guys, I was only kidding.
Mondo move, Master.
How'd you do it?
I didn't.
I sense a great evil.
A power tearing at the very fabric of the universe.
We'd better investigate.
Come on, fellas.
Hey, they sure make these things lighter here in Paris.
I think Master Splinter is right.
There's definitely something strange going on.
[MAGNETIC HUMMING]
Qu'est-ce? Qu'est-ce?
Whoa!
Whoa, incoming patio furniture.
I'm beginning to see a connection.
Those tables were made of metal,
just like our weapons. So?
So there must be some powerful magnetic force
attracting all the metal objects.
This compass should zero in on the center of the disturbance.
[MAGNETIC HUMMING]
RAPHAEL: Don't you just hate a compass
that can't make up its mind?
Quick, guys, let's follow that thing.
LEONARDO [SIGHS]: We'll never keep up with it.
Let's grab this taxi.
[MAGNETIC HUMMING]
Dudes, this whole city's gone gonzo.
It's not going crazy, Michelangelo...
it's going to the Eiffel Tower.
APRIL: Help! Someone help!
That sounds like April.
RAPHAEL: It's coming from that restaurant.
[MAGNETIC HUMMING]
If this is what goes on in kitchens,
I'm glad I've always avoided them.
Don't worry, April,
the turtles are here.
[MAGNETIC HUMMING]
Whoa-- Hey-- Wh-- Oh--
Whew.
Mm, not bad.
But it could use just a skosh more salt.
[GRUNTS]
Me and my big mouth.
[GRUNTS]
Lucky thing my bo is not made out of metal.
Oh, talk about nearly getting iced.
Are you all right, April?
I was doing this story on French restaurants
when everything started flying through the air.
What's going on?
There's some kind of magnetic disturbance
coming from the Eiffel Tower.
The Eiffel Tower?
[GASPS]
That's where Irma and Vernon are.
[MAGNETIC HUMMING]
Irma, Vernon? Where are you?
IRMA: We're up here!
Oh, no.
APRIL: What are you doing up there?
If you say, "Just hanging around,"
I promise: Snip.
Come on, Raphael,
let's get them down.
SHREDDER: This blasted generator
is attracting every piece of junk in Paris.
The tower looks like one gigantic garage sale.
[MAGNETIC HUMMING] What--?
What in blazes?
[GRUNTS]
[CHUCKLING] [SNORTING]
The boss and his magnetic personality.
[CHUCKLING]
Wha--?
The next worst thing to being stuck up here,
is being stuck up here with you.
Krang, your neutronic generator
is attracting everything except the Technodrome.
Naturally, you metal-faced mutton head.
You forgot to redirect the ion flow.
Ion flow?
You never said anything about any ion flow.
Must I hold you hand every step of the way?
[DEVICE BEEPS]
Rocksteady,
turn off the generator.
Now, why didn't I think of that?
[MACHINE SHUTTING DOWN]
Holy guacamole,
this whole thing is coming unglued.
LEONARDO: Hang on, we're almost there.
[IRMA SCREAMING]
[VERNON SCREAMS]
It's Irma and Vernon. They're falling.
Do something.
Don't sweat it, dudette.
Help is on the way.
Piece of cake.
Mm.
Well, there goes my diet.
Mm.
What could've magnetized the Eiffel Tower?
I think it was just freak atmospheric conditions.
It probably couldn't happen again.
Excellent, dude.
Maybe now we can do our tourist bit
and scope out some sights.
Hey, dudes,
it's time to party in Paris.
Sorry, April, we are on vacation.
Oh, I understand.
Maybe they don't think there's something weird going on,
but I sure do.
DONATELLO: Incredible.
You can see the entire city from up here.
No wonder.
It says here that the Cathedral of Notre Dame
is almost ten stories high.
Notre Dame? I've heard of them.
They've got a totally awesome football team.
Chill out, guys, someone's coming.
Yeah, someone has reported some crazy tourists
trying to climb the cathedral.
I go now to, how you say, "Check it out."
I do not see anything,
just the same old ugly gargoyles.
Hey, who are you calling old and ugly?
[YELPS]
The gargoyles, they are speaking.
[SHRIEKS]
We better get out of here
before he comes back with an army of gendarmes.
There's got to be a reason
why this tower turned into the world's biggest magnet.
SHREDDER: You lunkheads,
be careful with that ion flow converter,
or you'll explain to Krang if something goes wrong.
It's Shredder and his gruesome twosome.
Well, in that case,
we sure wouldn't want anything to go wrong.
I should've known old tin grin was behind this.
And this tape will be my proof.
Whoa!
BEBOP: Hey, look who just dropped in.
SHREDDER: Well, if it isn't April O'Neil,
here to cover her final story.
[LAUGHING]
Tie her up. We'll deal with her
after we finish recalibrating the ionizing generator.
Right, boss.
An art museum?
Don't you think we're overdoing this culture thing
just a tad?
Master Splinter says you can learn a lot
by looking at great art.
For sure. But what?
The dude who painted this ought to sue his eye doctor.
Hm. I wonder what he's thinking about.
I wonder what she's smiling at.
You'd giggle too if you were being painted
by a dude named Leonardo.
[GRUNTING]
I must find a way to contact the turtles.
My camera.
[GRUNTS]
If I can just reach it...
[CLICKS]
I just hope somebody out there is watching.
I may not know much about art,
but I know what I like.
And I like TV.
Michelangelo,
you're not supposed to touch the exhibits,
no matter how ugly they are.
Whoa, I see what you mean about ugly.
APRIL: This is April O'Neil,
I'm being held prisoner on the Eiffel Tower
by these mutants and their leader, Shredder.
TURTLES: Shredder?
I'll put an end to your snooping.
Shredder's got April.
Major bummer, dudes.
Guys, I think it's time to bring a little turtle power
to the Eiffel Tower.
This should keep you out of trouble for a while.
[CRACKLES]
Unfortunately for you, Miss O'Neil,
this is where the Technodrome will collide with the tower
when it is pulled through the portal from Dimension X.
Have a nice day.
[DEVICE BEEPS] Krang,
we're almost ready to transport you
and the Technodrome to Earth.
Well, stop wasting my time and throw the switch.
I'm already light-years behind
in my plan to conquer the Earth.
[DEVICE BEEPS]
I hope those idiots have finished
reconnecting the power cables.
Bebop? Rocksteady?
Are you ready to remagnetize the tower?
Everything's okay, boss.
Excellent.
LEONARDO: That's what you think, Shredder.
Wha--?
The turtles!
Doesn't anybody just surrender anymore?
[♪♪♪]
Looks like the boss is having trouble with his swing.
I keep telling him,
use an overlapping grip.
MICHELANGELO: Yo, dudes.
How about a little surfing,
Parisian-style?
ROCKSTEADY: Whoa!
I hope they dig the sewers of Paris.
Yeah, I hear it's a must-see for every tourist.
Whoa, we forgot about Shred-Head.
[GROWLING]
[GRUNTS]
You'll be one turtle
who's sorry he stuck his neck out.
[TARZAN CATERWAUL]
Peek-a-boo, guess who?
Stop it. Get off me, you fool.
I can't see.
[SCREAMS]
[ALL GRUNT]
Mercy bouquet, guys,
you saved my life.
Yeah. The question is,
was it worth it?
Now it's my turn, Shredder.
Huh? Wh-- Whoa!
Whoa--! Whoa--! Whoa!
You okay, dude?
You look a trifle shook.
Oh, I'm all right,
but Shredder's still up there with April.
[LAUGHING]
Even the turtles can't stop the Technodrome
from returning to Earth.
[MACHINE HUMMING]
That loud humming,
it sounds like the end of the world.
[RUMBLING]
I love that hum.
It's working.
And that fool Shredder
didn't think there was a mass of metal large enough on Earth
to build my electromagnetic antenna.
The Technodrome is too big to pull down to Earth.
Instead, it's pulling the Eiffel Tower
into Dimension X.
And April is still inside it.
My job here is done.
Till we meet again, turtles.
Old can head is splitting the scene.
Forget Shredder, we've gotta save April.
[♪♪♪]
I've got to override the elevator controls.
[BUZZING]
DONATELLO: Whoa, it worked.
[SIZZLING]
[LOUD RUMBLING]
[FIREWORKS EXPLODING]
Parisians are grateful to have their tower back to normal.
And you, my turtles,
are you enjoying your little trip?
Yes, Master.
Uh, but could we go back into the nice,
quiet sewers for a while?
Yeah, we sure could use some downtime.
Face it, sensei,
there's nothing more exhausting than a vacation.
[♪♪♪]